I am a freakin' dip

I broke my schnoz while roller skating. I wasn't even going fast. I wasn't even doing any fancy moves. I fell flat on my face and now I look like Larry Cszonka.

I used to rollerskate all over the place when I was young. Isn't is supposed to be like riding a bike?

Vicodan is a bit too much for me. Don't like the crawly out of the skin feeling. Extra Strength Tylenol is my constant companion now.

The worst part, I can't get a new nose out of the deal. I wouldn't mind getting a little taken off the top and the end. I've been reading "Awful Plastic Surgery" for years...I know what I shouldn't ask for. Oh, Santa....